Telly Talk

Eastenders
What on earth is going on in Christian’s flat these days?
No, we don’t just mean all the strange blokes or the odious sight of a naked Steven Beale lying prostrate on his bed.
But, specifically the decor and layout.
Wasn’t like that when Jase and Jay lived there about three weeks ago was it?
Has he knocked through? And did he get builders’ reg approval?
And what on earth possessed him to put that huge canvas print of his own slimey face on the wall?
Very strange.
Talking of Jase and Jay, anyone any idea where they are these days? Or Dawn? Or Keith? Or Terrence the Dog?
Thought not.
They’re all just victims of the great Bianca and Co takeover.
The writers are wetting themselves so much at getting our favourite big gobbed Chav back, they’ve forgotten to give any of the other characters a story line.
Not that we blame them really.
Bianca is still oddly compelling. In much the same way as a car crash or burning building. Who could resist her?
Certainly not Stacey Slater, who pales into utter insignificance besides The Master. Or Mistress.
"Don't start with me, you gobby little cow, cos I ain't in the mood," said Bianca as Stacey attempted to defend her rubbish fashion stall.
How we’re looking forward to more spats between these two.
They certainly make a better pairing than Stacey and Steven anyway. Yuck.
Next week, Lord help us, there’s more about that flaming magazine wedding...
Wake us up when it’s all over will you?